I borrowed this from my husbands blog. He writes at least once a month and most of the things he writes I always get sucked into. Not that they are always something I would normally be interested in reading but there is just something about they way he writes that I cant stop. Anyway here is his latest entry and I loved it so much I just had to post it on mine. Hope you enjoy.
It's been almost 22 years since I heard her beautiful voice singing, " Lord you are more beautiful than diamonds. Lord you are more costly than gold, and nothing I desire compares to you." I remember these sounds so clearly and vividly in the distant reaches of my mind. But is is also as a mist that disappears as soon as I return my focus back to this present state of time. Her name was Arleen, but to me; she was simply "MOM". She was a very kind hearted person. If angels really did exist and walk this planet in human form; then she was among the greatest of them. We laughed together, played together, and sang together. She was the great mediator to all. When my dad spent some time in jail and away from us; she was my comforter. I guess in a way; you can say that I was a traditional "Mamma's Boy". But, as in all realistic stories and tales of life and loss, the sinister darkness of cervical cancer developed within her. My little sister, Lindsey was born prematurely by c-section surgery to avoid the cancerous invaders from consuming her as well. She was born 4 lbs 4 ounces and is now 22 years old and in perfect health. That was a gift and a blessing given in such a dark time.My mom lived for about another year after my sister was born. She spent time at home in her own bed with a nurse that would stay with her. In 1989 she succumbed to the treacherous attacks of this dark disease and heaven welcomed another angel back home. Fantasy or not, this is one of the illusions that I will stick to until my dying day when I face the realities of if there's really anything out there.All we have in the end are our memories.
My 12 year old son D.J. is in the choir this year and recently had a Christmas musical that his choir sang in. My 10 year old daughter will sing for a Christmas musical that her school is doing as well. This will create warm memories for decades to come. The most valuable treasure that there is in this world in my opinion.What is the one thing that we all wish for whenever this body ceases to live? We wish for the continuation of some form of existence with our loved ones. In short, we wish to hang on to our "Personal Memories".
Memories are what make us who we are and ,in some form, what the rest of our bodies do to operate effectively in this world.We have memories of joy, love, loss, pain, the list just goes on and on. But they shape our lives and help to create our personal identities. Through the ages we have fabricated, added to, and taken away certain ideas, facts, and the like to either enhance, exclude, or change the meaning of our existence. But after all is said and done, memory is what really shapes this world.It is our comfort zone, a place where we create fantastic places to voyage to, wondrous people to whom help us on our paths to adventure and wisdom, and create a world for the dearly departed to embark upon and wait for our arrival.
There is also a problem with memory, I hesitate to say. But memory is only a poor reflection at best as the world as it really was. It consists merely of our own personal filters and therefore not actual. We either create memories that are more perfect than they were (Think back to all those old nostalgic movies of the "good ole' days" or the stories that you have heard), or we create a very dark sinister world, full of misery (This is the type of stuff that horror movie, extreme self-defense, and media history uses to feed off of our fears and anxieties).While I will always treasure my memories, I realize that they are not accurate manifestations of true reality (Whatever that really is. More on that in another posting for another time).
What must we do then? Well I am not suggesting that we become a Buddhist and discard our memories.....not entirely. I would suggest that from time to time you should conduct some mental spring cleaning. What things must be taken out to move on with you life? What would you like to keep as enduring qualities to be able to go back to an relish. and, what memories should be stored for safe keeping "just in case"?In short, especially during this holiday season; I say let go of what you think is supposed to be. Embrace your heritage. Enjoy your lives. Love everyone. And give your all. Because if memory is all that we do have left in the end, what else do you really need?
No comments:
Post a Comment